5 questions to ask before moving in together

Published on 29th July, 2024 at 02:05 pm

Are you and your partner considering moving in together? It can be a daunting topic of conversation! We spoke with two couples and Sanlam’s Senior Financial Planner and Investment Specialist, Adele Barnard, for advice on asking the right questions to find out if you and your partner are financially and emotionally ready to take this step in your relationship.

Reading time: 3 minutes

In this article, you’ll learn:

• How to speak to your partner about moving in together
• How to determine if you’re financially ready for the step
• Questions to ask yourself and your partner about expenses and long-term plans

1. Why do you want to move in together?

As simple as it sounds, it is an important question! Barnard cautions against making impulsive decisions and rather looking practically at all the factors involved before diving in. “It may seem obvious, but we could avoid a lot of heartbreak and financial hardship if people were honest with each other about their real reasons for moving in together. Make sure you are 100% ready for this step, emotionally as well as financially.” says Adele Barnard.

2. What is your credit score?

An important part of the preparation is knowing each other’s credit score. “Have this discussion prior to renting or buying property together, as your credit score has a massive influence on whether you will get the lease agreement or qualify for the bond,” says Barnard. Renting or buying a property together is a big financial step and you need to be honest with your partner about your financial situation before signing a lease or buying a property.

3. How will you manage household bills?

When Lerato Teffo (29) and her partner Carl (35) moved in together, they set up a structure to manage bills. “We have a very equal partnership so big purchases are split; but, sometimes one partner can pick up the slack, if need be, depending on that financial context,” says Teffo.

“We have a shared household account that we both contribute an equal amount to at the start of the month and use that account for any household or shared things (rent, groceries, bills). A lot of it is based on trust as we know the other won’t use the account for their personal things,” she adds.

4. What are our financial goals?

After three years of dating, Sinazo Zihle and Michael Mupulinga moved in together. “One thing I learned when moving in together is that decision-making is not just about you anymore. It has been a real eye-opener living with someone because every financial move now becomes about us. It is not singular anymore,” says Mupulinga. While there are still decisions that you’ll need to make for yourself, someone else may be now dependent on you and your ability to contribute financially.

“Most of the time we communicate when we must make big purchases. I ask Sinazo if it is okay to buy something, and most of the time she asks me if it is okay to make a big purchase,” he adds.

As a further step, Barnard recommends you talk about your future goals. “For longer-term financial goals, discuss what each would like to achieve. How can additional funds be saved to purchase your first property, or be paid into your bond? Does this current property form part of your retirement plan in the future as well?” These are just some of the factors that couples should be thinking about, she says, beyond the short-term excitement of moving in together.

5. Should we get a will?

When planning big purchases together, Barnard recommends ensuring you prepare and protect each other for any eventuality, even if the topics may not be fun to talk about.

“If you are buying the property also remember to have life cover, so in the event of the partner passing, the bond is settled. A will is also so important if you own a property together (especially if you are not married yet). At Sanlam, we can assist you in drafting your will for free. The will details your wishes. Make sure there is enough liquidity in your estate for all the estate fees, administration, and transfer fees for the property in the event of your death,” she concludes.